BY PETER LYNN
PROFIT-X

What you suspected is true: men and women communicate differently, and that can often lead to business misunderstandings. Here's how women can overcome these barriers to become more efficient communicators — and business leaders.

To be more effective business communicators, women must understand the differences between their communication styles and those of men, says image guru Roz Usheroff — and they must adjust accordingly.
"Men are taught to win," notes Usheroff. "Women are taught to be liked." Unfortunately, she adds, "coming in second doesn't count in the business world."

In a recent speech at the Administrative Professionals Conference in Toronto, Usheroff outlined four key gender communication differences. First, women tend to take things more personally than men do. More sensitive to criticism, they hang on to negative feelings longer.
Second, she says, "men speak to the point," conveying information to achieve a goal. Third, "women thrive on relationship-building." They focus more on consensus-building and are more collaborative than men.
Last, women are more detail-oriented. To men, who tend to zero in on the bottom line, women often share too much information.

Usheroff offers several general tips for communication success. Most important is to be adaptable. The more that women understand about the way men communicate, the less likely they are to be misunderstood, and the more influential they can be.

She also advises several practical communication "dos and don'ts." Among them: be aware of body language, and use positive non-verbal messages. But beware going too far: nodding too much, she says, makes women look subservient.

Don't be over-polite, seek approval, or ask permission to speak, she says. Achieve greater vocal authority by speaking from the diaphragm.

Try not to raise your voice at the end of a statement, as though asking a question. Slow down, she says, and "learn the power of the pause."

And if you want to win arguments, disarm your colleagues first, says Usheroff. Always find something to agree on before disagreeing.